I haven’t written in a while, I would love to say its because I have been so busy. Frankly, it’s because I have put myself on the hot seat. If that makes any sense.

Throughout this process of finding me, I’ve realized I only have been focusing on what I want and not what I need.

It’s hard to decipher my wants from my needs for example ”I really want these new pair of shoes, but in hindsight do I really NEED these new pair of shoes”. I use this example because that’s how I have let go of him. Now I’m not saying it doesn’t hurt.

Of course, I still think about him constantly. I believe I will always love him. That’s where my want to be him comes in so strongly. I just need to stay in touch with the need part. ”What I need from a man is a nonsmoker of pot, soften temper and doesn’t let the insecurities take control” .

The want is because I love him, over time he became my best friend. Here’s where I need to focus on what I need in my life verse what I want. The truth really first but it does set you free.